The sun was just beginning to drop behind the skyline and our skin was glowing. My skin was more so blinding but you get the gist. I was trying to hunt down each and every hors d’oeuvre that was being passed out by high school aged servers on silver platters without spilling my vodka cranberry. I had just spotted a fresh platter of something I could not pronounce but was Heaven in my stomach when my Great Aunt comes barreling at me, grinning.
I give her a hug and open my mouth. Before I can think about forming the words, “How are you?” she interrupts my thought process.
“Is this your boyfriend? Introduce me!”
My eyeballs had to be placed back into their sockets as I tried not to laugh in her face. “You remember Jimmy, my little brother.”
(Goofball & I went to the moon that night!)
A majority of my friends and acquaintances do not share in my singleness. I have plenty of friends in relationships and know my fair share of married couples. I have perfected the third wheel, and with the exception of craning my neck to jump in the conversation when I am forced into the backseat of the car, it is not horrible. My friends have some pretty legit boyfriends and husbands! Men that do not mind picking me and their significant other up when we hit the local bars, let me crash a home cooked meal with their girl, or encourage their wife to take a girls vacation with me. I got pretty lucky with these cool dudes my friends have found. These relationships are the healthy ones that involved years of dating-nothing was rushed because each couple enjoyed the various stages before lacing up their Nikes and grabbing a veil.
Not everyone is enjoying where they are at in life. There are far too many girls who are practically begging for a ring. What is worse, countless of these beggars are single. We all have different dreams, goals, and ideal versions of forever but you need to enjoy your life and be comfortable with yourself before you drag another human into your life. The people who hate being single are missing out on the now. You cannot enjoy Friday night pizza with the girls if you are worried about dieting for your wedding dress after one coffee date. Coming home with pink hair would be a no-go if you are constantly hoping for a romantic proposal and “to die for surprise photographs!” There is no way you’d jump in the car and go on a spontaneous weekend trip to see your favorite singer if you have to ask how your significant feels about you posting Kip Moore and Michael Ray on Instagram.
Even worse, complaining about being single is not going to make someone want to pursue you. Vying for someone to appear out of thin air with an engagement ring is not going to help your case. Some girls have a serious problem, thirst game strong. Praying for the ability to play house, thinking all of their insecurities will be swept under the rug by woodland creatures, and that all stress will disappear in their bi-weekly hot yoga class is beyond ridiculous.
Stop feeling down in the dumps because you are a party of one. Stop searching for a person to fill you up. Stop endless thoughts about your dream wedding.
Find what makes you happy. Embrace who you are. Go on adventures. And for the love of God, please stop rushing relationships, engagements, weddings, and babies. There is no reason you should be engaged three minutes after your first date. Having a boyfriend or a baby is not the recipe to a happy life and a lot of people are forgetting that in my experience.
Your ideal forever might include a man, a ring, a house, and babies. Your ideal forever might include becoming an animal shelter volunteering, tennis lesson taking, $20 salad eating, stay at home wife. Your ideal forever might include rescuing seven animals, living on an island, eatings tacos every Tuesday, or becoming the next E! reporter. Dreams take time.
Being single is not going to kill you, but if you complain one more time about not have a five carat diamond and twelve kids you just may kill me. Your dreams are valid; I encourage you to pursue your dreams. Remember that there is no timeline on your dreams and some take more time than others. Do not be afraid to slow down and enjoy the climb, even if that means you are alone.